By: Paonam Thoibi
`With right guidance and knowledge the road to choosing the right career can also be paved`
Q: Madam, my son is just 12 years and he is doing very well in a private school here in Imphal. As a parent, I have been always worried if I would not be able to know what he likes and where his passion lies. He seems to like many things and I may be exaggerating but I believe he will be able to do anything. Now my concern is that even a parent who is doing quite well in a government service I don`™t feel quite satisfied with my work and sometimes I feel like I should have taken a totally different path. I don`™t want my son to be trapped like me. What are some of the points I should look out as he grows up and how do I help him in choosing the right career for himself? – Manikchand
Ans: Dear Reader, it is very true that choosing the right career is not as easy. But with right guidance and knowledge the road to choosing the right career can be paved.
Many people think they know the right way to go about picking an occupation, but they often wind up choosing a career that is unsatisfying and gets stressed out very soon. A career/ guidance counselor or expert can provide the much needed guidance and facilitate in the decision making but it is difficult to rely totally on.
Choosing a career demands a full involvement and enough time. It involves understanding oneself as one makes an informed decision towards his/ her goal. One needs to take into account his/her interests, values, and skills when choosing a career. Affordability is often an ignored area but this should also be taken into account. Just because an occupation looks and sound good, it doesn`t mean that occupation is right for you. Everyone is different and what works for one person won`t necessarily work for another, even if that other person is someone with whom you have a lot in common. And you know how money doesn`t necessarily lead to job satisfaction. For many people enjoying what they do at work is much more important. It is important that they don`™t feel stuck at their job. Try talking to your son to know more about his likes/dislikes dreams and desires. Make him read about, talk to and be inspired by his role models. Tell him success stories as well as ideas which have been sparked from major failures of individuals.
Lastly, you should inform your son that any point of time he is unsatisfied in his career, for any reason, he can always change it and should not be held back or make any fuss about it. His skills will never go waste and instead it will always help him in one way or the other. Give him all the encouragement and support which he needs the most.
I believe these tips would be of some help for your son as he grows up and strive towards his endeavors. Best of luck to him and give my wishes.
Q: Mam, what disturbs me the most is the prevailing system of our rotten society and corrupted establishment institution of our states. In such dilapidated state could the younger generation be saved from the sidetracked, corrupted minds and perception which they inherited from the older successive generation? What if a right thinking mind wanted to serve the state with utmost sincerity by streamlining himself or herself from the people whom he associate with fallout minded by justifying the system as “normal” and deeming the honest one as “fool”? The irony is that, is it possible to get some sense of dignity among the wolves or to be submissive oneself to the larger interest which is against the principle of the system in which they justified it as “normal?” By just oneself honesty couldn`t change the perception of the people. So, is there anything to overcome this nightmare or is it adapt` is the only possible word to survive in this failure institution? I kind of lost my best perspective. Can you give me a better idea? -Singsonsonlal
Ans: Dear Reader, I am glad that you are addressing your worry here. The issues raised by you which revolves around the crumbling down of our social structure and its components of course does affect the psychological make-up of an individual, and also the community at large. The younger generation who are being brought up to form opinions and perspectives are at a risky position in this society which according to you has lost its essence of normalcy and is rotten now. Well, to put it in another way, you have highlighted an anxiety which is being experienced by a lot of people now, especially the youths who have now learnt how things have been till now and how it can be transformed into; but then again hesitant , taken aback and often gives up. This is a social dilemma and would need a holistic intervention at different levels.
As a psychologist I may want to suggest you to perform your best in your daily activities and engage in a healthy dialogue with your friends to understand the kind of different perspectives your friends must be having, which I hope must not be as negative or pessimistic as we are quick to assume. Who knows you may come across friends who will encourage you with positivity and enthusiasm. It will be helpful if you can attend counseling sessions in group or individually to address your existential concerns. This does not mean that something is wrong with you but rather is an encouragement that it can provide to clear your doubts and have you form your opinion and perspectives.Readers are requested to send in their queries at mindmifp@gmail.com